I read this quote today while researching a hunch I had about the link between social media and gambling. It’s about Facebook:
“I don’t really like it,” he said. “It seems to me that people who are on a lot are denying a couple things. They’re making time not exist – the speed of it, the instant back and forth. And, they’re denying that people grow apart.”
Like matrons flirting with one armed bandits, I find myself increasingly refreshing the page, hoping for a little red pop-up, a reward for being witty, interesting or cute. To be honest, I feel like a rat who gets a pellet for pushing the correct buttons. No matter how much praise I get, I still want more, and I want it now. Do the words mean anything to me, or is it just the thrill of the red bubble?
From now on, I want to concentrate on slowing down. When I travel, I prefer to linger, enjoying the passage of time and the ‘I wish things would never end’ sentiment (I’m the only girl I know who hass spent 10 days straight in Bangkok, not going to the islands). Why not apply this chrono-appreciation to the every day? Learn to savour the slow things in life…
The other point about cultivating dead friendships struck me too. Perhaps we should appreciate them as flowers, and accept sometimes they’ll wither away. Again, if they’re worth saving, we should take our time in reviving them, using love and face to face interaction.
With those fresh thoughts in my head, here are several beautiful things that are slow, delightful and worth taking time over:
Bread rising…
Weekend sleep-ins…
Train travel…
Processing film and printing photos…
Fromage…
Reading books…
Crystals…
Walking or even rambling…
Brewing your own ginger beer…
Let’s take our time?
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
That’s awesome, Amber. I really appreciate that message, and it’s something I’ve been working on for a while. We all know that the journey is more important than the destination, but it’s awfully hard to reconcile that with wanting to keep on track. I’m glad you’ve been able to find what works for you.
I love this <3 I think you hit the nail on the head with the rat analogy.
Here's some thoughts on what the internet is doing to our minds.
http://www.salon.com/books/laura_miller/2010/05/09/the_shallows
http://melissawiley.com/blog/2010/05/10/this-is-your-brain-on-the-internet
This is fantastic, and really made me stop and think. Thanks Amber x
Nice piece, Amber. I’m finding with Facebook, that its increasingly becoming an obligation, which is how they draw you back to the site. It seems all the privacy issues around FB at the moment are also about how the site treats you. Rather than let FB control you, you need to tell FB what you want from it. I’m curious to see what comes along to replace FB…
And HOORAY for walking. Love it.
Lovely! And it would seem to be the week for thinking about such things, I just posted a blog post nee manifesto on exactly this. Now I’m thinking it needs photos :)
Aimee: Thanks lady!
Peter: Love it/hate it but it’s quite a useful tool and does have benefits. E.g. A lot of people use it as a calendar function (the social part of social media!). Interesting sidetrack: last night I was speaking to a guy who is several thousand dollars in debt and holding a few benefit shows with local bands. When asked what the line up was, he pulled from his pocket a full colour flier. We then realised where his money was going. Wouldn’t you just stick to the Internet (hi, FB) & a few big posters for your small gigs? Anyway, I wish there was something cleaner, less frivolous with my information out there.
Thomas: Those are grand! My friend Jonny recently declared he’s “Not bothering with anything unless it’s MAGIC” – I might keep that one for myself.
Oh so true. I think if my friends weren’t smattered so irritatingly about the globe I would be less obsessed, maybe. Tumblr has my heart these days, at least it’s partially creative!
I like this post a lot. Important stuff to remember.
Hi Amber,
Loved loved loved this post. I know more than one person who is most definitely addicted to Facebook, even updating statuses while they’re out doing something far more interesting with real people! You’ve inspired me to start a new book and enjoy it with some bread and brie this long weekend.
Alana
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