If I’m ever in sartorial doubt, I like to get shirty. Yes, the humble T-shirt is revered as my saviour when things get tough. Over the next while I’ll be chronicling some of my favourite pieces of cloth.

To start with let’s look at that ubiquitous trifecta of kitsch: the wolf, eagle and stallion tees.  Of course there are other animals, I am partial to this hilarious rhino one… but those three take the cake. Why do hipsters and tourist dads and I love them so?

(All the t-shirts featured are from the delightful AnimalShirts.net)



Raw, gorgeous and mystic. Or something like that. Wear a wolf shirt, howl at the moon or your favourite band. Feel unstoppable energy coursing through your veins. It’s more fun and looks better than carrying a crystal in your pocket.



Eagle shirts are all about paying homage to the good ship America. Or your manliness. Feeling like people aren’t respecting you? Throw on a massive bald eagle shirt and watch the peons bow at your feet in awe (I gave this advice to a creative director once).


wild horses

The top left shirt, the Grey on Grey, would look brilliant on a guy. For myself, it would have to be the wyld stallion ripping up the main stage. I think for many girls, horses are part of the fantasy of a perfect childhood. For me it’s all about Patti Smith and rock.

Speaking of horse shirts, Martin Margiela (all hail mystery!) was in the news last year for his colossally expensive rip off of a British artist, David Penfound. It’s a really interesting case, yet apparently this level of ‘appropriation’ happens all the time.

If you’re digging the look, Vain and Vapid suggests buying one of Penfound’s tees to alter (available on eBay). Simply buy one in XL size and slit the sleeves at the bottom, attaching the excess fabric to the side of the shirt. Finally, sew in shoulder pads. Easy to do and you’re supporting the true creative.


It’s not a horse shirt, but something even better…

Horses sweater

Behold! I picked up this emerald green horse sweatshirt at Urban Outfitters in Liverpool. It’s actually from the menswear department but that didn’t (and never will) stop me. It’s paired up with a tee, black jeans and funny little brogue inspired lace ups.

Buy me a pony!

Black Jeans


Aw nah, I take it back, I love ponies – ❤ – What’s your spirit fashion animal?